ಮದುವೆಯ ಈ ಬಂಧ ಅನುರಾಗದ ಅನುಬಂಧ!

Dear Dr Nataraj,

That was a very nice article on ThatskannaDa about Katrina . I was reading few things on web these days & was unable to understand various nittigritties about the incident & I felt good to see some intrinsic details in the write up.

More over Katrina, I could appreciate the way Risk assessment is done which you have explained in much simpler way. Even for software projects, we do a Risk Mitigation plan which goes in similar lines :-) Due to time constraint I scribbled few lines in English, baraha would take more time, please dont mind! My Regards to your family.

Thanks,

- Veena

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NamaskAra Dr. Nataraj.

I thoroughly enjoy reading your articles in thatskannada.com. I wanted to especially thank you for the wonderful article about Deepa and Bens wedding. My husband and I know Deepa and her family very well, but couldnt attend her wedding since we were in India on vacation at that time. Your report was really a testimonial to the type of people Deepa, Ben, Sudha and Ramesh are, in addition to the description of the meanings of various rituals.

Also just finished reading your latest article about creating/managing cultural organizations in the USA. Everything you have written about rings so true :)

Best regards,

- Mangala

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Dear Sir,

My name is Nanjunda.N , presently pursuing MS at Brigham Young University, Provo, UT.

I am a regular reader of thatskannada.com and this time, I happened to come across your article on marriage of Mrs.Deepa Ben. First generation Indians like, me and Deepa have so many advantages as wells are limitations (like finding soul mate).

I am finishing up MS and looking forward to begin my life with a soul mate. But being in USA makes this simple matter very complicated, as I cant go often to talk to girls in India and find out about their likes and dislikes (can be termed as DATING).

The only way out for me now is to find girls through matrimonial websites, the technological advancement of 21st century. Though technology has advanced quite a bit , in my personal opinion, lacks the comfort of personal face to face communication. Its tedious process of sending acceptances to girls and waiting untill get their response and then start chatting or talking to them.

In the light of all these technical difficulties, i personally feel, marriage of Deepa was obvious. As a joke, for Deepa its better to be with a known devil (one whom she personally know) than an unknown god (a guy from India).

Based facts and figures you have provided, it looks like, the boy and the girl are quite sensible enough to avoid religious any discrepancies.

Above all, its they (boy and girl) who are going to live together than other people (jab miya bivi razee ho to kya karega kaazi). Being an Hindu,i heard marriages are made in heaven and i feel same with these people too. Otherwise, marriage between a girl born in east and a boy born and brought up in west, would have been impossible.

Though the inter religion-inter racial marriage are not uncommon, still it takes a while for Indian mind set to accept it. However there are some facts as INDIAN-AMERICANS we need to understand.

We, Indians are here in USA to make our life better. If so, we will live in a culture other than ours and different from ours. Any thing can happen either for good or for bad. On the good side, marriages like Deepas keep happening, which not only breaks the barrier of religion and culture but also teaches VISHWA MANAVATHE.

Sincerely

- Nanjunda.N

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Dear Dr. Nataraj,

Nice to read about Deepa & Bens wedding. Thanks for writing an article about it & explaining the significance about various steps/rituals in the wedding. Honestly I have not read either of the books that you have mentioned but more or less these are the ones which are followed in any Indian marriages.

The following opinions are mine about it.

While explaining about marriage you have expressed your dislikes on various facts(like gaudy wedding cards), I dont know whether you referred Indians who have migrated here or the people living in India. I will be wrong person to comment on the first group but I will try to put my views on the second group(since I belong there:-))

As we all know that prejudices dominates the Indian society & hence is the sole reason of such things. I have noticed few things in my own experience. People easily comment out saying idda obba magaLa maduvenu yeno asToMd saada saada maaDidru, avara wedding card noDidre annisutte maduve saadharaNa antha. If you print a message like No gifts please as we are blessed with pleasures by GOD , we will easily get classified under illaMdru tuMba kobbu kind of people :-) More over parents/in-laws (may be my own) themselves will show importance to these fantasy. They finally end up quoting bandavaru yen aMkoLalla? qualification haakisodu beDa andre, people will mis interpret as bride being highly qualified than the groom(which may be ok for you & me but not others). wedding card koTTa takshaNa modalu noDuvudu qualification anne, amele tamashegaagi comments bere, which can look like... yen bahaLa joraagi varopachaara irbeku.

So heege society ge takka prejudice, appa ammana maatu keLahoraTa yuva janaru ishTavilldiddaru oppale bekaada sannivesha. illadiddare society ya prakaara oLLeya makkaLalla. onthara emotional blackmail annisutte which many of us get easily defeated by :-) Before I end, GOD bless Deepa & Ben. Let the couple lead their happily married life.

Best Regards,

- Veena Shivanna

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Dear Nataraj

I am Raghu from new jersey, read your article about Ben and Deepa’s marriage, I was very much impressed by this article, as I am also planning my marriage in coming months, this article will help me to convince my parents why we should go for simple marriage and also to the girls parents who are ready to spend a fortune for there only daughters wedding.

First I was inspired by kuvempus mantra mangalya now you have given me this article which will also help in talking to my parents about a simple marriage, who are all set for grand gala…...

Sir again this was first article I read this morning and it’s really made my day, I am taking printout to show it to my parents.

Hope I am not breaking the copyright rules…………………

-Raghu

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ಡಾಕ್ಟರ್‌ ನಟರಾಜರಿಗೆ ನಮಸ್ಕಾರಗಳು,

ಅಗ್ನಿಸಾಕ್ಷಿಗೆ ಬದಲು ಮನಸ್ಸಾಕ್ಷಿ .... ಎಂಬ ಲೇಖನವು ಸಮಯೋಚಿತವಾದ ಉತ್ತಮ ಲೇಖನ. ಈ ಲೇಖನದಿಂದ ನಮ್ಮ ಸಮಾಜ ಕಲಿಯುವುದು ಬಹಳ ಇದೆ. ದೀಪಾ ಮತ್ತು ಬೆನ್‌ ಇವರ ವಿವಾಹ ಮನುಕುಲಕ್ಕೆ ಮಾದರಿಯಾಗಲಿ.

ಸಾಲ ಸೋಲ ಮಾಡಿ ಡೌಲಿನ ಮದುವೆ ಮಾಡುವುದು ನಮ್ಮ ಸಮಾಜಕ್ಕೆ ಒಂದು ಶಾಪ. ಹಣವಂತರು ಮಾಡಿದ ಅದ್ಧೂರಿಯ ಅನುಕರಣೆಯನ್ನು, ಅಷ್ಟೊಂದು ಹಣವಂತರಲ್ಲದವರೂ ಅನುಸರಿಸಲು ಪ್ರಯತ್ನಿಸುವುದನ್ನು ನಾವು ಇಂದಿನ ದಿನಗಳಲ್ಲಿ ಕಾಣಬಹುದು. ಈ ಪದ್ಧತಿಯಿಂದ ಯಾರಿಗೂ ಲಾಭ ಇಲ್ಲ.

ವಿವಾಹ ಸಮಾರಂಭಕ್ಕೆ ಸೇರಿದ ಜನ ಸಮೂಹವು ಸಪ್ತಪದಿಯನ್ನು ತುಳಿಯುವ ನವ ದಂಪತಿಗಳನ್ನು ಹರಸುವುದಕ್ಕಿಂತ ಜಾಸ್ತಿಯಾಗಿ ಕಂದಾಚಾರದ ಶಾಸ್ತ್ರ ಮತ್ತು ಅದ್ಧೂರಿಯ ಬಗ್ಗೆ ಆಸಕ್ತಿವಹಿಸುವುದನ್ನು ಕಡಿಮೆ ಮಾಡಬೇಕು.

ತಾವು ವಿವರಿಸಿದ ಸಪ್ತಪದಿ ಮತ್ತು ಪ್ರತಿಜ್ಞಾ ವಿಧಿಯ ವಿವರಗಳು ನಮ್ಮ ಯುವ ಜನರ ಮನ ಮುಟ್ಟಬೇಕು. ಈ ರೀತಿಯ ಮದುವೆಗಳು ನಮ್ಮ ಸಮಾಜಕ್ಕೆ ಮಾದರಿಯಾಗಲಿ.

ನಮಸ್ಕಾರಗಳು

- ಎಸ್‌. ಎಮ್‌. ಪೆಜತ್ತಾಯ, ಬೆಂಗಳೂರು

ಮುಖಪುಟ / ಅಂಕಣಗಳು

English summary

Thatskannada readers reponses to Dr.M.S.Natarajs Jalataranga Column.